Behind his Smile
by dragongirl5k5
Summary: He was the person I admired most in the world. And he cared about us much more than he cared about himself. Maybe that's why he hid his pain, and why he protected us. If he died without regrets, why does it hurt so bad? Why did I have to love him so much?


This is a story from Hinata's point a view about Naruto. It could be taken as NaruHina, or strong friendship. I got the idea after listening to How to save a Life by The Fray. If this touches your heart in any way, then I've done my job. Hope you like it....Reviews would be very, very much appreciated.

_Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto._

_Warning: Alternate Universe, Angst, love, character death, suicide, and cruel reality._

* * *

_Epilogue_

It had been a long time since I met him. I had always been a very shy girl with low self-esteem. Probably because of my father constantly putting me down. I try my best but it seems as though nothing will please him.

But this isn't about me. This is about him. The boy who changed my life, the boy who helped others, the boy dared to love.

* * *

It all started years ago when I first met him. I'd never really paid attention to him much back then. That was until he was in my homeroom class when I was twelve.

He was always getting into trouble and trying to get attention. I never knew why though. I mean I was shy so I'd rather not have so much attention directed at me. Why was it so important to him? That's when I started to watch him.

I noticed things about him that I never had. When he didn't cause a ruckus or misbehave, no one looked at him. No one even bothered to acknowledge him. At recess no one asked him to play. He would just sit on a swing all by himself. Now I know why he wanted attention so badly.

He really loved to fight. I'm not exaggerating either, it was his passion. He practiced ninjutsu, taijutsu, and kendo like a lot of people at our school. He always tried to beat the best in class, Uchiha Sasuke. He was the cool guy that everybody seemed to like.

But him, Uzumaki Naruto, was different. When he fought Sasuke everyone expected him to fail. When he acted out, they laughed and called him a klutz, or an annoying nuisance.

If it were me I would cringe at those mere insults. But he just smiled and laughed with them. He seemed so much stronger than everyone else, even tough they couldn't see it. He trained harder than anyone else just to get by.

I soon found myself watching him more often. One day while he was training in the woods he collapsed from the harsh exercise. I ran to his side and found him unconscious. That's when I got an up close look at his face.

His bright blonde hair seemed to be a bit messy, and his form looked also a little dirty. He had cuts and bruises in some places that had been left unattended. The poor kid.

I decided it would be best to let him rest. But I left him some nice, cold water and a snack for when he wakes up. A refreshing energy boost might make him feel better.

The next day on my way home he stopped in front of me. I was so shocked all I could do was blush. He smiled brightly and for some reason that one smile directed towards me lifted my spirit.

"Thanks so much for the snack yesterday! I was really tired and it tasted very good! My name's Uzumaki Naruto,what's yours?" He asked cheerfully. I smiled seeing his blue eyes full of gratitude just for the smallest gesture.

"H-hyuuga Hinata." I stuttered. That was a bad habit of mine. But he didn't seem to mind at all.

"Well, Hinata we should be friends! I've got to go but we should hang out sometime, okay?" He said cheerfully. I could only nod in response. Why was that warm smile so comforting to me?

* * *

For the rest of that year I discovered what a wonderful person he is. After a while he started hanging out with Sasuke and Sakura. And soon he was friends with my my friends, Kiba and Shino. Soon he was friend with everyone.

He was always smiling and laughing and it was contagious. Even the gloomiest kid in school, Gaara, couldn't help but smile around him. In fact he helped Gaara change his entire life around. Before the red head would strike fear in everyone, and was almost insane. But Naruto saw past that and reached out to his aching heart.

Not only that but he helped my cousin Neji. Naruto was the one to finally knock him off of that high horse of his. Ever since Neji's fathert had died he had been cold to everyone and resented our entire family. You see his father had died to protect my father; they had been twins.

Naruto had been the first to defeat him and change his out look on life. The boy had a special gift that I wish everyone had. He was able to help people even when they gave up on themselves.

He even seemed to help Sasuke a little. Everyone thought he was a lost cause after his family had been murdered. But ever since he made friends with Naruto he's been a little nicer. They're like brothers really; even though they won't admit it.

* * *

When we were fourteen he invited me over to his house. I blushed and nearly fainted, but I agreed. He lived in a bad part of town where it wasn't always so safe. His house was a small one bedroom room apartment with a small balcony.

"You live alone?" I asked him.

"Yah...it's just me he," he replied half heartedly.

"What about your parents?" I asked timidly. His face grew solemn and something flashed through his eyes, something I had never seen. What it sadness?

"My mom and dad both died when I was a baby. I have no memories of them at all. My dad a murderer actually, so nobody really likes me for that. But after he met my mom he turned his whole life around and vowed never to kill again. And he never broke a promise..." He smiled at the last part.

"Well one day, when I was a baby a man came and tried to take me for revenge against my father. My mother gave her life to protect me. Even though my father wanted to kill him, he wouldn't go back on his promise. He saved me but lost his life as well...." He finished.

I hadn't ever known his ast was so painful. I had tears at the edge of my eyes and so did he apparently.

"You know, I don't care what anyone says I'm proud to be their son." He choked out. As he fought to hold back tears I realized that he needed help, and I was here. I wrapped my arms around him and he embraced me too.

"For some reason the only thing I can remember is their screams..." He sobbed. I felt tears falling down my cheeks. But I had to be strong for once; for him.

"I understand....I lost my mom too." I said comfortingly. "I understand..." He hugged mt tighter and we stayed like that until all the tears were gone.

That was the only time I saw him cry. And I knew he was a true friend, and he knew he could trust me. Because I was one of the few people to see him broken.

He had taught me how to be brave, and how to be strong. He had even inspired to finally stand up to my father and gain his respect. That day was probably the happiest of my life. And Naruto said he was proud of me, which made my heart soar.

Eventually I grew less shy and more confident. And everyday seemed to be a bright one. All our friends and us hadn't a care in the world. Everything seemed okay, but it was far from it....

* * *

One night I sat with him up on the roof....

"Hinata, do you ever wonder what it likes up there in the starry sky?" He asked.

"Well, I think it would be beautiful." I answered.

"I would love to be a star. To be free of everything. You caould never feel pain or regret. And you would never be alone 'cause there are millions of them. I want to live a life like that; no regrets." He said dreamily gazing upwards. I looked to imagining if what he said were true.

"Thank you Hinata." He said suddenly. I looked at him confused and he laughed.

"Thank you for being my friend and for believing in me. You and all the others mean the world to me..." He said starring at me with those blue orbs. It was as if him eyes could see all the pain in my soul and purify it with his smile.

"You've inspired me and so many others, Naruto. You're a great friend." I finally said with all my heart. He gave me the brightest smile he ever had, and left without another word.

* * *

The next day, I didn't see him at all.....

"Hinata, there's....something I have to tell you.." Neji said. I sat down beside him and saw that his eyes were rred like he had been crying.

"What's wrong?" I asked now worried. I saw tears brimming at his eyelids and I almost thought he wouldn't answer. I wish now that he hadn't.

"N-naruto.....Naruto is dead." He said solemnly. My face was in pure shock. I felt my eyes water before I could even think about what to say.

"W-what?" I managed to ask. My throat was so dry and my cheeks so wet.

"Hinata he....he killed himself." He said sadly before burying his face in his hands. He started to sob too. Neji was sobbing; it must be true.

N-n-no....NO!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I ran to my room and slammed the door shut. I cried and cried, until I couldn't breathe. And then I cried more. '

Why...Why would he do this?! He was happy wasn't he? He was fine, he was okay! But no...No, he wasn't okay. That's just what he wanted us to believe. Why would someone want to kill themselves, when they mean so much to people? What did he see himself as? Why didn't he say anything?! Why couldn't he share his pain?! Why did he have to go?

* * *

I refused to eat. My younger sister, Hinabi, came to comfort me. She rubbed my back soothingly and was as supportive as possible. I thanked her but asked to be alone. I couldn't sleep at all and just ended up crying more. I staye in there for two days before finally going to see my friends.

They were no better than me. Some were furious, some were hysterical, some were shocked, others were depressed. But everyone was in pain.

At the funeral I there were so many people, and I didn't know half of them. So I met a lot of them and all say Naruto had helped them in some way. He really was a great person wasn't he. A lot of people spoke about him there.

A tall white haired man who was his godfather. A young silver haired man, who sounded like his protector. A brunette with a scar on the bridge of his nose, who was like a father to him. An old, but young looking woman, who talked like a grandmother would. And a young boy his sisters age, who clearly idolized him. Even Sasuke spoke and shed a tear.

After hearing them all speak, I worked up the courage to say a few words. This was my only chance, to say good bye to him.

"When I first met Naruto, I thought he was just a normal boy. But I learned he was so much more than that. He was an inspiration to people. He would listen to anyone no matter who they were, and not judge them. He could feel any ones pain and understand it. He had a gift, that man had long forgotten. The gift of a pure smile, the gift of touching someones heart.

I know for me and all of you, he has somehow helped us in our lives. He gave us hope, gave us faith, and gave us courage. And yet....we couldn't see behind him mask. I caught a glimpse once of his pain; I've seen him cry. And I now know why he hid it from me. To protect us. He wanted us to be happy, not for us to see him suffer.

He was had to be strong and brave to endure it alone, but.....he did. All for us! So, even though I want to sob, cry, or break down completely...I won't. Because he loved us, and I loved him. And even in death, I know he wouldn't want us to be like this.

The last think he said to me was thank you. But I thought I should be thanking him. He helped me find the courage to speak out and be strong. But this isn't about us or our pain! It's about _his!_ So....I'm going to be strong, I'm not going to break. I'm going to hope, that he's happy."

And first it was silent. Then an applause came from all the mourners. And I kept my promise; I wiped my tears. I did it for them, but mostly for him.

* * *

_Prologue_

That night I gazed up at the sky just as he did. I hope he's up there just like he wanted to be. I hope he's with his parents, my mom, and others. I hope that his pain is gone and that he can rest. I hope that he can be as happy as he made us. And I hope I never forget his smile.


End file.
